The Future of It Is What It Is

The best way to predict your future is to create it.

Abraham Lincoln

My posting to this blog came to a screeching halt in July of last year. That was when my email subscribers no longer received an email announcing a new post. I knew this was coming but failed to determine a path forward. I decided to take time to consider this. And as time has a way from getting away from us, I am with no resolve. So, stepping back from not only posting but writing as well, I have determined the following:

• I miss writing and would like to continue one way or another.
• I miss instant blog publishing and could continue with a different hosting service meeting my needs.
• I would like to compile a book of curated posts from 12 plus years of blogging.
• I would like to compile a book of the travel blog posts from my 4 traveling years living houseless.

Without further ado, I am ending It Is What It Is as it exists now. It’s been a pleasure to share with you my take on life, and I look forward to inspiring you in one form or another in the future. Thank you for following me and sharing your insights as well.

I hope you will continue to learn from the circumstances of your life as I do each day. While no one knows what the future holds, I intend to create the space for mine.

Until next time...

With love,

Michelle

Quote illustration 227881941 © Rashmi Singh | Dreamstime.com

The Edge of Miraculous

That's me on the edge of West Sedona, AZ on a hike around Chimney Rock.

“We live at the edge of miraculous.”

Henry Miller

With this post, we celebrate my 200th posting! Since 2010 I’ve enjoyed sharing my ups, my downs, and my all arounds in an attempt to inspire you to consider the best within yourself, to guide you into forward thinking, and to learn from the circumstances of your life. I reflect on these things every day and have found them to be powerful influences in my life. I am making it a point to consider every day as living at the edge of miraculous.

With that in mind:

• Even though I have been blogging for a number of years, I have never stepped into the social media scene until the last few days. I can now be found on Facebook as well as Instagram and the new travel website my husband, Dennis, and I collaborate on www.damclark.com. While I will continue to post weekly on both sites, it will be fun to share my thoughts on any given day via Facebook, and photos of where I am and what I am doing on Instagram. Other than these hyperlinks noted, you may also find links in the Follow Me section of the sidebar. This is a big change for me personally, and I am looking at the social media scene as if I were standing on the edge of miraculous.
• I would also like to share with you an exciting change in the future of It Is What It Is. Once again it’s time to update the look and feel of this website and will do so in the upcoming months. Change, my word for 2016, is guiding me to the edge of miraculous time and time again this year, so it seems appropriate that this website follow suit.

I do believe we all live at the edge of something. Try considering and making whatever it is miraculous. This type of forward thinking will change your life. Celebrate with me as I embrace my 200th post with miraculous. And if you are allowing fear to slow forward thinking and miraculous days ahead, just know I am with you and I am holding your hand!

Living at the edge of miraculous in Sedona, AZ courtesy of our Clark family photos

Path to Peace

On April 29 - I consider the life of a man struggling with countless complicated issues. My brother, Mike, took his life two years ago today. Many may still wonder how this could happen and why. What I will say is this: In the end, every corner of his life seemed to be failing. So let us not just consider his life, but take note of his death. This was his choice, and I honestly feel a great relief for him. His struggle is over and he is now on a path to the peace he had long searched for.

If Mike had died of a heart attack or cancer, we would not be asking why, we would not be contemplating the what-ifs. There are no do-overs in this, and there are no what-ifs. It is up to us, the living, to accept Mike’s choice, send love his way, and move forward. His family and friends have different memories of him, the best of these we should hold near our heart.

While I know Mike has found his peace, I am not so sure some of those who loved him have. So I offer you my favorite prayer by St. Francis of Assisi, in the hopes you may find your path to peace.

Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

Where there is injury, pardon;

Where there is doubt, faith;

Where there is despair, hope;

Where there is darkness, light;

And where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;

To be understood, as to understand;

To be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Amen.

On this day, my thirty seventh wedding anniversary, I continue to light a pathway of peace for Michael.

Pretty lights photo courtesy of ANDR3W A

Running Up Hills

Last fall I had a soft tissue injury in my foot that kept me from running for six weeks. Recently, I had a cold that, once again, kept me from running. Now, I am hitting the pavement once more, but backing off my normal pace and mileage until I am fit enough to push ahead once again.

I’ve learned many things from my years of running. What I am focusing on now is getting back to small steps. It was small steps that propelled me up the hills around my home when I first began. While my legs might scream, or my endurance lag, it is taking those smaller, quicker steps that get me to the top of the hill.

I love the challenge of hills, and would much rather run up a hill than run flat. As I was out running, taking my smaller, quicker steps today, I was thinking what a metaphor smaller steps really could be for many things challenging us. It’s much easier to not push forward, to not make necessary changes, to run on the flats. While my journey through life takes me up many hills, I take pleasure by pushing forward one small step at a time. I know, by taking small steps, I will make it to the top of whatever hill or challenge is in front of me. It’s not easy getting back in the swing of things, doing what you should do, or making the necessary changes to push forward once again. Just don’t get caught up in the hill in front of you, or the one after that. Grab your shoes and hit the pavement one small step at a time. You can do it. I'm right there beside you.

Running shoes photo courtesy of luiginter

Training Wheels Not Included

"Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving."

Albert Einstein

When I was six years old, I received a beautiful blue, Schwinn, two-wheeled, bike for my birthday. I couldn’t wait to take it out on the rocky side road next to our home. Fortunately for me, it came with training wheels. I took learning to ride this bike seriously, and couldn’t wait for the day my training wheels were taken off. When the big day finally arrived, I proceeded to balance, wobble, and ride my bike up the road. I remember the big smile I had on my face before the front wheel hit a very large embedded rock, and abruptly stopped my forward progress. Up and over the top of the handlebars I went. I ended up with a cut on my lip and an assortment of bruises, but refused to have my training wheels reattached. After all, I had experienced moments of balancing bliss. A few more attempts, and I had the balance thing figured out. I’ve been working on balance and moving forward ever since.

These days, creating a balanced life seems to revolve around time; two things I strive to have more of. Closely related, it is difficult to have one without the other. Like time, balance changes in a split second. It takes constant consideration on my part, a vigil of sorts, to keep balance in check. I equate being out of balance to attempting to ride my bike, without training wheels, and continually falling over. If I am not making the time and doing what is necessary for me to create balance, I am not moving forward. When I am not moving forward, I am not happy. See how that works?

In my life, balance includes taking the time to do what is necessary for my health and well being, first and foremost! When I do this, I can be a better me. While life doesn’t come with training wheels, I am discovering it is up to me to set my own standards in order to maintain balance in my life. I can allow everyone else to carve out a piece of my time, a piece of me, or I can choose how I want my time allocated. Unless I set my own standards for living, I will ultimately be out of balance. With each little discovery I make, I am finding the balance that works for me. I am finding the key to happiness, with or without training wheels.

Girl on a bicycle photo courtesy of anyjazz65

What Have I Learned?

It has been a whirlwind of a year with extreme lows, extreme highs, and everything in-between. The constant need to make decisions seemed to accelerate with each passing moment. At times, circumstances came with a heavy heart, but I moved beyond the weight and found what it meant to celebrate what is. In a year with much diversity, I ask myself, what have I learned?

... to look forward and allow this word to guide me throughout the year.
... to feel like a kid again by embracing the joys of Jell-O.
... to leapfrog grief after the loss of two dear friends.
... to bring more focus to my life by paying attention and looking both ways.
... to take the pressure off and relinquish priorities to a bit of putzing.
... to protect what’s mine after a prowler poked around my home.
... to accept the choices of loved ones after the loss of my brother.
... to celebrate what commitment truly is on our thirty-fifth wedding anniversary.
... to move my book closer to publishing by getting it done.
... to look up and engage my senses.
... to find a glimmer of hope in tough love.
... to give thanks by looking ‘em in the eye.
... to get out of my own way with simplicity, one less thing, and box worthiness.
... to clear a path forward to the future.

I feel the whirlwind of this year moving me into next year. Follow me as I continue to find my way through the lows, highs and everything in-between by celebrating what is.

Twirl through the flowers photo courtesy of Anita Hart

It’s Complicated

"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated."

Confucius 

I have a tendency to overthink many things. Over time, I developed ways of sorting out the insanity in an attempt to move forward.

1. I am a maker of lists and a sticky note fanatic; and I’ll be honest, I enjoy checking items off my lists and tearing up sticky notes. I liken it to a momentary celebration of one less thing! Yay!
2. I am a researcher extroidinaire. When I am buying something, I have a tendency to research it to death until  I have collected so much information I am on overload. No celebration there.
3. I am an analytical thinker. When lists, sticky notes or research just doesn't cut it, I go into flowchart mode. My analytical mind is a buzz of if this, then that, until I figure out just what I need to do. This slows my mind and breaks things down into logical steps.

With all this overthinking, there is a point when I am just complicating the whole matter, even if I am merely trying to buy a new refrigerator. Over the years, I have gotten better at catching myself when I have reached the tipping point.

Either out loud, or in my head, I say, stop, enough, or give it a rest girl!

When I hear myself say this, I abruptly stop and let go. I see the moment for what it is ⎯insanity. In that moment, I refocus. Sometimes, I simply stop whatever it is I am doing in order to regroup at another time before I shutdown on the matter altogether. I’ve gotten rather good at shutting down when I am overwhelmed with how to move forward. The truth is, shutting down permits me to procrastinate. But, sooner or later I have to revisit whatever it was in the first place. When I do, I hear myself say, simplify, simplify, simplify. In other words, I allow myself to get out of my own way.

I think most of us have a tendency to complicate the matter, whatever it may be. We refuse to get out of our own way. Whether it's lists, sticky notes, research, flowcharts or whatever you do to sort out the insanity, it comes down to one word: simplify. Break the insanity and simplify. It is your choice, and is as simple as that.

Berry Good photo courtesy of D. Sharron Pruitt

Puzzling Moves

Next spring marks the twentieth year in our home. Over the past few years, my husband, Dennis, and I have been talking about where our next home might be located. We also discuss whether it will be a house, condominium, townhouse or who knows what. We have no clear path to what the answer is to any of those questions. What we do know is this⎯it will be smaller, and it will be sooner rather than later. 

When we first moved into our home, we planned on being here twenty years. My how time flies. With our love and sweat poured into this place of ours, we have improved the house and the five surrounding acres, and have made it into what it is today. We still enjoy the peaceful location, the home itself, and the land, but our hearts are not into it as much as they once were. Maintaining it has now become more of a burden than a joy. When you find yourself saying, I would rather, more often than not, it’s time to reevaluate.

It has been frustrating to think about moving, so we don’t. It’s like having a pile of puzzle pieces that don’t quite fit together. Recently, I had the realization⎯we aren’t ready to move. As in, if we are going to downsize, we need to start shedding and eliminating. In other words, we have too many puzzle pieces⎯we need to purge and clear a path forward! While we aren’t keepers of all things, and we get rid of stuff on a regular basis, we need to go deeper and get rid of the pieces that will not fit into the next space of our lives, whatever that may be. We will prepare for the possibility.

Currently, we are both of the mindset⎯we are moving! This thought alone is freeing and will help us move forward. I firmly believe, when we are ready, we will know it. Then we will be able to answer the questions we have been going round and round about, and the remaining pieces of the puzzle will fall into place. In other words, when we are ready, the path will clear and something will come up and be just right for our needs. We’ll know.

Can you trust in the unknown? Can you develop a forward mindset and start putting the pieces of the puzzle together without knowing what it looks like? Can you find a way to your path? Can you trust, by simply moving forward, the answers will come? When your heart is not in it, whatever it is, it is time to reevaluate, purge and move forward. You’ll know. Prepare for the possibility.

Puzzled path photo courtesy of Magnus Akselvoll

Get It Done

Memorial Day weekend marks the unofficial start of summer. From now until Labor day, people plan picnics, go camping, get together with friends and family for barbecues and hit the road in a frenzy to get the most out of whatever time we may have for that summer way of life.

As for me, I am intending to wrap up a major loose end this summer. Recently, I have been working on publishing my book, It Is What It Is. Making decisions as to what each page of the book layout will be is a bit daunting. What font do I want to use here and there? Where should the page numbers land? How should the chapters sit on the page and on and on. It’s all those things book readers don’t have to consider. I have also been working with a graphic artist on the cover, and once again more decisions.

It has been a bit difficult to give the time needed for the book layout while continuing to write my weekly blog. I usually take some time away from the blog during the summer, this year I will be starting a few weeks earlier. Since I won’t be publishing weekly, here are a few things you can do:

• Set a weekly alarm and go back and enjoy earlier posts
• Forward some of your favorite posts to others to share the love and grow our subscriber base
• Pick one thing to get done this summer

Is there something you want to put a wrap on once and for all, or perhaps there is something new you would like to do to shake things up a bit? What’s the first thing that came to mind when I mentioned picking one thing? That’s it! Get it done with me this summer. I know by fall I’ll be jumping for joy just getting IT done. There will be one less loose end while we all continue to move forward and get it done this summer.

See you in the fall,

Jump for joy photo courtesy of Scott Ableman

Breaking Ground

My daffodils broke ground weeks ago, and seemed to be inching slowly upward, until last week when they shot up four inches! Yes, spring moved in last week like it was making up for lost time⎯with tree frogs croaking up a storm, the neighbor’s peacock informing everyone that mating season has arrived and the return of the migrating birds singing their praises each morning.

With a few days of sunshine, temperatures “soaring” into the fifties, and sixteen hours lovingly tending the gardens around my home, I should have a serious case of spring fever. It hasn’t even come close to hitting me yet. Even though the frogs, peacocks and various migrating birds would beg to differ.

With all the rain we have had, I have not gotten a chance to do my normal fall and winter gardening. So, last week I made gardening the priority and began the annual chores with fall and winter catch-up work, then moved onto spring-cleaning in an attempt to get ahead⎯maybe, just maybe. I enjoyed breathing the fresh-cut grass smells, and getting up-close and personal with my flowerbeds once again. I indeed have broken ground by following the frenetic rhythm of spring⎯as evidenced by the soil stains on my jeans. But with this burst of garden exuberance, there seemed to be more back breaking than ground breaking!

I don’t usually try and take on everything at once, but with the forecast showing another wet week ahead, it is in my best interest to do what I can in the garden now. I hadn't planned on breaking ground quite so hard this week, but like the daffodils shooting upward, I shot forward in my garden.  If we can just string a few more killer days of sunshine together, I know spring fever will hit me⎯it always does. And, maybe, just maybe I won’t have to continue breaking my back by squeezing so much garden exuberance in all at once. Instead, I can break ground at a more reasonable pace as spring officially rolls forward in the weeks ahead.

Always Works photo courtesy of cogdogblog

Eating to Live: Avocados, Coconut and Flaxseed

It has been nearly a year since I last reported on my never-ending food journey. With science, being what it is today, there are many reports of eat this, not that; only to find, years later, you should eat that, not this! What’s a person to do? I, for one, am trying to eat as healthy as I can on a regular basis while still enjoying those things that are not actually considered healthy on a not so regular basis⎯white chocolate chip, macadamia nut cookies anyone?

Without going into an exhaustive explanation about saturated and unsaturated fats, and the average American diet consisting of an overabundance of Omega-6 to Omega-3 fatty acids, and that this imbalance contributes to inflammation in our bodies, you just might be interested in the following: 

Avocados
I have always loved avocados, but considered them to be a high caloric food, so imagine my surprise when I found they had gotten a bad rap. Yes, high in calories, but mostly heart-healthy unsaturated fat, and avocados are considered a nutrient-dense food! Knowing this, I eat avocados on a regular basis now, and because I only ate them occasionally in the past, I have some catching up to do.

Coconuts
I’ve heard about the wonders of coconut oil for many years, but once again was looking at its high caloric content and stayed away from it. It wasn’t until the last few years, when coconut products seemed to be popping up everywhere, that I started to investigate coconut oil more thoroughly. Let’s just suffice it to say, I am successfully using coconut oil, when baking, in place of butter or shortening in recipes. While it is still a saturated fat like butter and shortening, it has a low Omega-6 content, and antioxidant properties that help fight inflammation. Does this mean I should be eating more Mounds bars?

Note: Coconut oil is a solid with the consistency of a firm vegetable shortening. We have been taught, over the years, that all fat solids are considered saturated and therefore bad for us. Science may be proving that some saturated fats are actually good for us, as may be the case with coconut.

Flaxseed
When I tried a gluten free diet a few years ago, I came to know and love ground flaxseed. I sprinkle it on many foods and eat it by the spoonful. Since I do not eat a lot of fish and am probably low on my Omega-3’s, eating ground flaxseed not only adds more fiber to my diet, but also adds the necessary Omega-3’s. The flavor is surprisingly nutty and you will find it is a great fiber addition to smoothies along with the noted coconut oil and avocado above.

I rather enjoy this never-ending food journey of mine. It helps me explore foods and improves on a healthy approach to living. This in turn helps to move me forward in a positive direction. But, don’t be so shocked the next time you see me eating a basket of fish and chips, something I love. I just make sure I don’t enjoy this basket of goodness often. Also, it has to be the very best, not just any old basket of fish and chips. Oh, and the best⎯panko breaded.

Laughing photo courtesy of nosha.

Forward

Are you looking forward?

Are you moving forward?

Are you where you want to be?

Are you doing the things you want to do in your life?

Are you living your best life?

2013 has begun, and with a new year comes a new theme or word to follow me, be with me and guide me throughout each day. I will embrace my word, love my word and learn from my word. I will remind myself of my word as I move through my day. I will ask myself if what I am doing, saying and feeling honors my word. My word, as you may have already guessed⎯FORWARD.

While others may focus on resolutions this time of the year, I find having one word motivates me in more ways than I will ever know. Resolutions have a tendency to magnify my shortcomings when I fail to do that which I had resolved to do. Resolutions are soon forgot and do not necessarily move me in the direction I would like to go.

Forward is positive

Forward moves you ahead

Forward is the right direction

Forward is further than you have been before

Choose a word or theme that will motivate you, provide momentum to live your best life and move you forward. Will you be walking in someone else's footsteps or beginning a path of your own? Will you be repeating the same path you have been on time and time again? What direction will you be heading? Join me as I move FORWARD one step at a time into the rest of the year.

Footprints photo courtesy of Kimba Howard